Many of us struggle with what to say when someone has died, when bad news arrives, when things are hard. Or we need to hear some words in those moments.
Words to say. Words to hear. In hard times.
A hospital chaplain can help.
I was sitting next to my mother’s bed, keeping watch during the last hours before she died. I’d been a hospital chaplain for a few years, long enough to know what I said to other people, now having to tell them to myself. I don’t have any way to prove what I’m about to suggest. … Continue reading What I assume (but don’t know for sure) about that time while someone is dying.
Finding words of support in hard times isn’t about formulas. It’s mostly about listening, avoiding uninvited advice, and offering support for the current moment. Here’s a recent example, with some commentary on why I said what I said. +++ A friend texted the other day: “The police just brought my dad home. He got lost. … Continue reading A short conversation in a scary moment.
I wanted to write something to my generation. I was prepared to be sarcastic. “Hey Boomer! Tell your kids that you are going to die so they know what to do when it happens. Because we are dying.” I wanted to write it because I work in a hospital. I talk to families before and … Continue reading Hey Boomer. We’re dying.
A hospital chaplain with a PhD in communication can help you find the words.
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